Therapy is shrouded in misconceptions. One of the most common misunderstandings is that therapy simply entails describing your problems and challenges while the therapist listens and nods. Whilst speaking and listening is certainly a crucial element of therapy, it is far more complex and active, on both sides, than this suggests.
The theme of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week is community, as evidence shows that feeling part of a community can create a sense of belonging and purpose. Close connections assist with a sense of belonging, and sharing how you feel with others can increase connection, but it’s also important to remember that your friends and family are not your therapists. So, what is therapy and how does it differ from a conversation with a friend?
What Therapy Is
At its core, therapy is a professional and considered process which is designed to help individuals to understand themselves, enabling them to navigate life’s challenges and improve their emotional wellbeing. Whether you’re dealing with mental health issues, relationship struggles, work-related stress, or personal goals, therapy offers a safe space to explore and process this.
1. A Collaborative Partnership
Therapy is not a one-sided process. It’s a collaborative relationship between you and your therapist. While therapists are trained to guide individuals and offer support, progress is only possible if the client engages in the work. This partnership relies on mutual respect, trust, and openness.
2. A Place to Gain Insights and Self-Awareness
Therapy provides you with a deeper understanding of your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. Through guided conversations, therapists help clients to recognise patterns, uncover underlying issues, and gain new perspectives. This insight can be transformative, helping you to identify the root causes of stress and unhappiness, to work towards lasting change.
3. A Safe and Confidential Environment
One of the defining features of therapy is the safe, confidential environment it provides, a space in which you are free to share your deepest thoughts and struggles without fear of judgment. This confidentiality allows you to be open about experiences or feelings that you may feel less comfortable discussing with family or friends, and this can empower you to move forward.
4. An Active and Structured Process
Therapy is not passive. While it may involve talking and sharing, it’s also about actively engaging in the therapeutic process. You may, if you wish to engage in this way, be encouraged to participate in exercises, set goals, work on coping strategies, and practise new skills between sessions. Therapy requires commitment, accountability, and willingness. If this sounds difficult, though, it doesn’t have to be, with the right therapeutic relationship.
What Therapy Isn’t
1. Therapy is Not Just Listening
A common myth is that therapy is simply someone passively listening while you speak. While therapists do listen, attentively and with empathy, they are also actively involved in the process. We ask questions, offer reflections, and provide guidance. Therapy is about helping you to make sense of your experiences, find solutions to your problems, and develop coping strategies for handling challenges.
2. Therapy is Not About Giving Advice
While therapists may offer insights, strategies, and suggestions based on their expertise, therapy is not about receiving direct advice or instructions on how to live your life. Instead, it’s about discovering what feels right for you and exploring your own values, desires, and goals. Therapy helps you to gain the necessary skills to make informed decisions that work for you.
3. Therapy is Not Always a Quick Fix
Therapy is not a magic wand; it’s a process, so it may take time. Healing and personal growth require patience and self-reflection. It’s important to understand that therapy is a journey; you might not feel immediate relief after one session but, with time, change becomes easier and more possible.
4. Therapy is Not Just for Mental Ill Health
While therapy is often associated with serious mental health issues, it’s also a valuable resource for anyone going through life transitions, relationship challenges, or those who just wish to explore their own personal growth. Therapy can be for anyone looking to improve their wellbeing, not just for those with diagnoses.
The Active Process of Therapy
Therapy is a structured, active process that encourages insight, personal growth, and lasting change. While we, as therapists, listen and offer support, we also play an active role in guiding you towards solutions, helping you to develop skills, and challenging you to explore your thoughts and feelings. It’s a journey that requires participation and a willingness to engage with both the therapist and the process itself.
Ultimately, therapy is not a passive experience but a truly empowering one, one that can transform your life by helping you to understand and appreciate yourself and your relationships with others, leading to positive and lasting change. Choosing to engage in therapy may, therefore, be the strongest, bravest and most powerful decision you ever make.
